A couple months ago God asked me to do something. Not a big something and it wasn’t urgent, but I’ve lived in doubt over whether I could do it, I didn’t feel ready or big enough.
What does a step of faith look like? Does it have to be big? What would a little step of faith look like? Does the size of the step make it any more or less significant?
Often a strategy for those battling a mental illness and those supporting them is to celebrate the little victories, to acknowledge that what may only seem a small or negligible achievement for some can actually be something that deserves celebrating for others.
When God first made this suggestion to me months ago I shared with a friend that I felt scared and overwhelmed by the thought. For while it might have seemed like a non-issue for lots of people it was going to be a big step for me. Her advice to me? Little steps and don’t rush. She suggested that I didn’t need to view it as a single big step, but rather could treat it as smaller steps. And that by acknowledging God’s suggestion and how I felt about it I had in fact taken the first step, and that in itself deserved a little celebration.
It’s not all that different to the approach I take when I’m working on a jigsaw puzzle. Looking at the whole pile of pieces can seem incredibly overwhelming, but you just work on it one piece at a time, and that one piece then becomes two pieces joined together, then four, and then before you know it something starting to actually reasonable something starts to appear.
These are lyrics that I’ve been listening to lately… (from the song Walk on the Water by Britt Nicole)
So what are you waiting for?
What do you have to lose?
Your insecurities, they try to alter you
You know you’re made for more
So don’t be afraid to move
Your faith is all
It takes in you
You can walk on the water too
What have I got to lose? It’s true, the insecurities run amok and the mind can come up with some really creative things that could be lost. But really, what truly is there to lose if there is faith there that it’s the right thing?
In the Bible, faith is described as “being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.” (Hebrews 11:1) I am certain of God’s love for me. I hope for when suffering and struggles will end, for when “He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’ or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” (Revelation 21:4)
I’ve written before about how a pocketful of faith is enough, that no matter how small it may be, God can still take it and use me. That even faith as small as a mustard seed is enough (Matthew 17:19-20).
So that’s what a step of faith must look like. Trusting that the faith we have is enough, no matter how small, and just saying yes.
So get out and let your fear fall to the ground
No time to waste don’t wait
And don’t you turn around and miss out
Everything you were made for
I know you’re not sure
So you play it safe, try to run away
If you take that first step, into the unknown
You know he won’t let you go
I took that first step into the unknown today. While a negligible achievement for some, this is a step that I’m going to celebrate. Yes the fear and insecurity were still there, but the faith that God’s got this is greater. I stepped and didn’t fall. Whether others think it was a big step or a small step I don’t think matters. What does matter is that that’s what a step of faith can look like for me.
Ponderings of a Daughter 